Driving I was filled with a sense of angst and uneasiness. I had been holding onto frustration, disappointment and some anger. Comparison is the thief of joy… we hear that phrase and we generally conclude that we are feeling less than, but sometimes the opposite is true. We expect things from others based on what our abilities and strengths afford us. We are then disappointed when they fail to reach our expectations.
I arrived a little early and waited wrestling with my thoughts, searching for a way to put them away. My friend pulled up, I hopped in her car and squashed my unhappiness and smiled my biggest smile as we drove off to climb the mountain. We had a great conversation and my focus was beginning to shift.
We met up with the rest of the group and I could feel my shoulders relax and the smile was no longer forced. I was truly happy to see everyone and get started on our adventure. It was a thick foggy morning, we were hot and sweaty as we trudged up that mountain. The rocks were tough, our breathing labored, along with our grunting, we laughed and smiled as we made casual conversation and kept on climbing. The first stop provided a tropical like feel and more of my body was beginning to respond to the subtle mood change that was taking place.
We continued on to the top, this rocky overlook that appeared to have nothing beyond it because the fog was so dense. We spent some time there nourishing our bodies with snacks and hydrating as well as gathering up our strength to finish the journey we had started.
Off we went, it was not the strenuous climb we encountered on the way up, but rather a tricky rock filled delicate step process down for a little while until the path became clearer. By the time we reached the waterfall the feelings that had been stealing my joy evaporated. I was refreshed and relieved.
I was free to be me again. I was once again completely happy and relaxed. I had taken back the power I had given away when I allowed myself to be bogged down with thoughts and frustrations caused by things that are out of my control.